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Saturday, December 22, 2012

10 Things You Should Know About Women

Women are complex, confounding, difficult to fathom, impossible to predict and so on.
While you need a lifetime and more to decipher a woman, you can read this article and get a heads up. We are about to let you in on the 10 things you absolutely need to know about a woman.

1. Women hate being compared

They may ‘jokingly’ ask you how you think they compare to their female friends. They will coax you to answer but you have to hold your ground. No matter what, DO NOT COMPARE. Because no matter what your answer is, you will end up upsetting her.

2. PMS is for real

If your weenie bled for 5 days every month, you would be cranky too. Be grateful that you don’t have to endure this biological discomfort and be considerate towards the after-effects she experiences (every month) because of it.

3. Women know when you ‘look’

You may make a surreptitious attempt to look at her cleavage or/and at her breasts, and you may think you have succeeded in ogling at them without her knowing. You are wrong. A woman will know when you look (stare). So if she questions you about it, don’t be a fool and deny it. Either way, you will get an evil look for looking at what is not yours to look at.

4. Women have a sex drive

Shocked? Don’t be. Contrary to popular Indian belief, Indian women do have a sex drive. They are not coy creatures who will flutter their eyes and sigh deeply when you touch their shoulders. They are in fact nubile beings who will grab your butt and wink at you if they are interested. If they are not interested, you will get an evil look. Or a slap. Depending on your sickness meter.

5. Women love being taken care of

Not being ordered around and being dominated, but women love being taken care of. They especially love it if you hug them after a long day, or if you tell them that they should take it easy or when you volunteer to hold their bag. So sweet!

6. Women love romance

This shouldn’t surprise you. If it does, WOW!

7. Women are protective of their girl-friends

Okay, there will be days she will crib about her friends and get upset and tell you how ‘that one’ behaves bitchy and how ‘this one’ thinks she is one bit too smart. She is ALLOWED to say whatever she wants about her girl-friends. If you EVER as much as utter one negative thing about any of them, she will eat you up alive.

8. Nothing beats Gossip!

Gossip, girl-friends, gin – the 3 Gs that rock a woman’s world. Bring them all together and you have an absolute winner.

9. Women ALWAYS want to eat dessert

Women want a waist like Katrina and legs like Deepika, but they want dessert more. If you ask her whether she would like to eat desserts, images of Katrina’s waist and Deepika’s thighs will flash in front of her eyes and she’ll say no. If you simply call for a dessert of her choice, she’ll devour it first and then you! ;)

10. Women grab their crotches too

But as Padmalakshmi rightly said, they are decent and sensible enough to do it in the privacy of their bedrooms or bathrooms. A habit that men need to develop too? Yes, we definitely think so.

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