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Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Why Men Cheat?
Men cheat for various reasons.
However the topmost reason for a man to cheat is boredom. It’s like having the same meal every day. There’s nothing more to look forward to. The sex is the same or maybe it is not there at all. There’s no newness to look forward to. Men cheat because they get bored of exploring the same body. A new body is like discovering a new planet; new sights, new smells, new textures, new challenges!
Men cheat if their wives stop taking care of themselves. Amidst babies, job, bills, cooking and cleaning, women often let go of themselves. When the wife has given up on herself, while the husband continues to groom and dress up (even if it is to go to work), he is bound to think of himself as a catch, as being better than his partner. When such indifference creeps into a relationship, it is bound to tempt the man to park his vehicle elsewhere. Men will go to some place where they feel appreciated; where the woman shows that she wants to look good for him.
Sometimes men cheat because they can; because the woman is easily available. She might not even be as attractive as his wife (that is irrelevant), but just because the opportunity is right there, they take it. They think it is harmless; it means nothing; it is just a fling; there will no repercussions; it’s a one night stand. And that will be the end of it. Cheating, sometimes, is just the thrill of doing something which is prohibited.
When one has been in a relationship for long, things become stagnant. Husband and wife get busy in their own lives and have no time for each other. Gone are the days when they went on dates to fancy restaurants, new movies, or plays and concerts. They don’t talk enough, they don’t share anymore. And all of a sudden, someone new comes into the man’s life, someone who shows an interest in him. Someone who wants to know his fears, his dreams, his goals, who laughs at his jokes, who ruffles his hair and calls him cute. Basically someone who takes him back to the honeymoon phase of a relationship. This one too will progress into something as tedious as his present relationship, but still, this phase is so exciting, he falls for it.
Sometimes men cheat not out of compulsion, but because of the kind of equation they share with this person. It just sort of happens. Most affairs take place at work because that’s where men spend a large chunk of their time. It could start off as a relationship stemming from a common interest, like a favourite band, or a favourite holiday destination or cuisine. Gradually, there develops a sort of an emotional dependency. These kinds of relationships don’t even begin with the thought of having sex, but translates into physical intimacy over a period of time. If the woman shows empathy and kindness and offers a ready shoulder to cry, the man gets drawn towards her because she is nice to him and she cares.
Whatever be the reason, men who cheat are royal douchebags. There is no excuse to cheat. Period. Cheating men are like animals with a taste for blood. There is no reason to not believe that a man, who has cheated once, will not cheat again. However, women are no saints either. They cheat too, more often than not, more or less for the same reasons. They just might have a little more self-restraint than men, but that’s a flimsy curtain to hide behind.
In conclusion, it really comes down to valuing and appreciating each other, making each other feel good about themselves. Be kind and show interest in each other’s lives, because it is not really about sex all the time, it is also about having a deep emotional connection. If you feel the urge to cheat, think of all the good, happy times you’ve spent with your partner, think of the reasons you fell in love, think of the things you did with each other. If there’s enough respect and love, you will not be able to cheat even if you feel like it. And most of all, communicate. If you find yourself interested in someone else, talk to your partner. If you feel there is nothing more for you in this relationship, be open, be candid. Get out of it, if that’s what you want, because no good comes out of cheating but only hurt and heartbreak.